Love Is Honest

Love is honest.

You don't hear people talk about lies a lot these days. It's kind of a given that you are "allowed" to lie as long as it's for a good reason. How many times have you lied to your significant other because it was for a surprise, or because it was "just a little lie"? How many times have you "left out the truth" because it was "in their best interest"?
Honesty is a huge part of loving someone. It's been said that "Honesty is the highest form of intimacy". Loving someone is more than sharing secrets, it's making a promise to never lie, to always tell the truth.

There are so many instances in the bible that tell us this.

"Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth." (1 Corinthians 13:6)

" Love must be honest and true. Hate what is evil. Hold on to what is good." (Romans 12:9)

"For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit;" (1 Peter 3:10)

We must strive as people who are "taken"-and even more as Christians - to tell the truth no matter the consequences.

"Trust can only be given when honesty is guaranteed." If you are not honest with the person you love, there is not even a chance that they will ever be able to trust you. All lying does is tear apart relationships. We lie to ourselves, and we are torn apart. We lie to God, and we have sinned. We lie to our spouse, and there is a lack of trust that may never be able to be gained back.

One of the reasons I believe the people were all so drawn to Jesus when He walked among us was that He spoke truth to them. He didn't sugarcoat, He didn't lie about anything. He told them the truth, and that is what they were drawn to: Honesty.
 When you tell the truth, and refuse to lie, a bond is created that could never be there otherwise.

"Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil." (Matthew 5:37)

Stay honest, and you will never have a reason not to trust the one you love.

Many blessings,

Marisa

Love Is Forgiving

Love is forgiving.

You may have noticed that I skipped a topic. I accidentally missed a day, so I went right to forgiving. 

Love is forgiving. It does not hold a grudge. " It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.". 

God blesses us daily with His forgiveness, and thank goodness He does, because without it, we would all be in hell burning.

"There is no one righteous, not even one." We are all humans, we all sin, we all need forgiveness multiple times daily whether it is for saying something that shouldn't have been said, or for doing something that shouldn't have been done.

" I stood a mendicant of God before His royal throne
And begged him for one priceless gift, which I could call my own.
I took the gift from out His hand, but as I would depart
I cried, “But Lord this is a thorn and it has pierced my heart.
This is a strange, a hurtful gift, which Thou hast given me.”
He said, “My child, I give good gifts and gave My best to thee.”
I took it home and though at first the cruel thorn hurt sore,
As long years passed I learned at last to love it more and more.
I learned He never gives a thorn without this added grace,
He takes the thorn to pin aside the veil which hides His face."

This poem rightly reminds us that we are all self-loving, unrighteous beggars before the throne of God, and all we have to offer is ourselves. We have no real treasures, our money could do Him no good. Even if everything we owned were not already His, it could never be enough to repay Him.
All we have is ourselves. Our own merciless, sinful, pitiful, begging, ungodly, ungrateful, forgiveness-needing selves. And simply because we have been forgiven, Jesus Christ asks us to forgive others as many times as they sin against us. Because as many times as we have sinned against Him, he forgave it all.

Love keeps no record of wrongs. Forgive easily.

Sweet dreams,

Marisa

Marriage Is Not Undoable

"Differences in interpretation about when the Bible allows divorce (if ever) leaves some Christians feeling our hands are tied when we long to extend them in compassion. Plus, our deeply held belief that "it takes two" to make a marriage work mistakenly translates into a belief that "it takes two" to break a marriage up. We subconsciously assign blame accordingly.
However, the truth is that it only takes one to wreck a covenant."

Marriage is not Undoable.

It's not something you can go back on. Once you truly love someone, heart and soul, you can't undo it. There's nothing that can change it. This goes back to several of the other things I've been talking about. Love, and marriage is a packaged deal, it is a promise, and a vow. Once you are married, it is no longer an option to fall out of love.
Just like when Christ died on the cross, He will not undo His sacrifice, we must be unwilling to even entertain the idea of divorce.

Similar to words, once it is said and done, you can't take it back. It is non-negotiable. Many consider divorce as an option, but once you are married, once you have promised, vowed to cherish forever and ever till death do you part, divorce is not a thing. It isn't even close to being a thing. It is non-existent. 

"Till death do we part". There is no room in that sentence for "but he hurt my feelings" or "but what if I get tired of him". Till death do we part. That's it. 

Many blessings,

Marisa

Love Is A Packaged Deal

Love is a packaged deal.

When you marry someone you can't marry them just for their body, or just for their looks, or sense of humor. You marry them for everything. Good days and bad days. Laughter and anger. Sweet things and bitter things.

You love their body and soul.

Jesus gave us an example to follow when He died for us. He died not because we were good, but because we were not. "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."

'While we were yet sinners.' Not 'once we were good enough' or 'when we were ready' or 'once we could cope on our own', No, 'while we were yet sinners.' Christ loved us and still loves us for our good and bad days, laughter and anger, sweet things and bitter things. He loves and cares for us despite all of our flaws. Despite the fact that we will never be able to repay Him for all the things He has done for us.

And so, just as He accepts that about us, we need to respect our spouses. Flaws and superiorities.

Love Is Godly

Love...is Godly.

Love is a work of art that is constructed after what Christ did for us. He hung Himself on a cross for us, knowing full well the pain and agony He would be in.

He is the original lover. He was the first, and He will be the last. Jesus Christ is the model after which all love should be modeled. We should aspire to love as long and well as Jesus has. Love is a sacrifice that He willingly made for us. "Greater love has no man than this that he lay down his life for his friends." Jesus did all that. He doesn't need to prove His love to us anymore. He already has. He died for us, He bled for us, He cried to show us that it's okay to cry, He literally went through hell and back so we wouldn't have to, and He loves us more than any earthly father could love a child. He had no thought for Himself when He came down, willingly to be in pain worse than we can imagine.

"One of the primary characteristics of godly love, however, is that it is focused more upon others than upon ourselves.  Did you notice verse 5 above?  It says that love “is not self-seeking.”  Indeed, Jesus said, “Greater love has no one than this: that he lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13).  Of course, this is exactly the type of love that Jesus showed for us!  And this is the type of love that we need to show to our spouses as well."

Our love in a Godly relationship should be as that of Christ and His church. The ultimate bride and groom. The first ever marriage bond. When we promise to love and cherish someone, we are promising to be as Christ-like as possible. Whether that means holding someone late at night like He does, or forgiving where it is not deserved as per His example. When we slip on that wedding ring, we are making a vow that we will walk like Christ did, and love...love like He did His church. We are promising that we are willing to lay down our lives for our spouse-to walk through hell and back again to make sure they are safe and will not have to tolerate pain anymore.
We are promising to honor them, and speak to them, to be loyal, and to grow closer each day to Christ, and thereby to our spouse.

"There are no quick fixes to growing in godly love.  Spiritual growth is much like physical growth: it’s a process that takes time.  But just as physical growth is helped by solid nourishment, so too is spiritual growth.  Here are two avenues that will provide some solid nourishment for our spiritual growth in love in marriage.

1. Getting to know Jesus – Jesus is the perfect model of selfless love.  In Ephesians 5:25, husbands in particular are commanded to follow Jesus’ example as they seek to love their wives.  If we would seek to love like Jesus, we need to be serious about getting to know Jesus more intimately.  This happens through good fellowship with other Christians, reading God’s Word, and prayer.  Again, this is not a “quick fix”.  It is a process that takes time.  But it will aid us greatly in learning to love with a godly love.
   
2. Relying upon the Holy Spirit – love is explicitly called a fruit of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22).  As a result, godly love is not something that we muster up in our own strength.  Instead, it is something that God Himself empowers us to do by His Holy Spirit.  This means that we need to look to God in repentance and faith on a day-by-day basis for the strength of His Holy Spirit."
   
   
    There is no way to be completely like Christ. He is perfect, and forever, and though every model has defects, He never did, and He never will. He is...the perfect bridegroom, and the church is meant to be His perfect bride. Model your marriage after Christ, and His bride, and you will never need to hesitate to say you love your soul mate.
   
   
   Sweet dreams, gems.
   
   
   Marisa 

Love Is A Promise

"Because real love is a promise, not a feeling. God created us to express love that way. Expressing anything less, no matter what temporary heights you reach, robs everyone, including yourself. You see, God, made us to be highly motivated to want the promise much more than just the feeling alone. It is the only way to make the whole thing last and get every last best drop of those precious feelings to be had from it! It is the only way to feel safe in our relationships and with ourselves. Break the promise and every thing thereafter is set up to fall short and be suspect from even the tiniest dread of betrayal."

Love is a promise. A vow.

It is a promise not to leave, and never to forsake. God loved us first-from the very beginning, from before our beginning even existed, and insodoing, He set an example for us. An example that tells a story. One of love and adoration. When Christ died on the cross, He promised to love and always do what is best for us.

In the same manner, when a man gets down on one knee, and asks a woman to marry him, He is promising to her (as she is to him if she says yes) that he will love her, choose her over any other, protect her, listen to her, commit to her, hold her when she is crying, laugh with her, forgive her, and never stop promising those things until the day he dies.

C.S. Lewis perfectly states: “Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling… Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go… But, of course, ceasing to be “in love” need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense — love as distinct from “being in love” — is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriage) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God… “Being in love” first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.” (C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity)

 You can love someone without being in love, just as you might "be in love" with someone who you do not truly love. You can get those sweet, fuzzy emotions every time you see them, but unless you are willing to truly promise them your forever, you do not love them.

Love is a sacred promise. Unbreakable, sweet, innocent, unmovable, and forever.

Malachi 2:16 “The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “does violence to the one he should protect,” says the Lord Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful."

 If you are unwilling to promise all these things: faithfulness, patience, kindness, gentleness, a listening ear, etc then you have no business saying you love anyone.

"So we are given such strength to keep that promise by a Maker who knows that we can…even under the most trying of circumstances (Hosea). God demonstrated that it was possible to love even the adulterous nation of Israel and by such love to lead them back to restoration of their covenant marriage.
As the brother of leading Christian apologist, Ravi Zacharias, explained to him on the eve of his own marriage: “Write this down and don’t ever forget it. If you will to love someone, you can.”."

The world tempts us to believe that in order to love someone, we must know them. We read in stories about arranged marriages in which people are unhappy.
Ravi Zacharias reassures us that "If you will to love someone, you can".

Love is always possible. But you have to be willing to promise it, and dedicate your life to it, first.

Many blessings,

Goodnight.

Marisa

Love Is Not A Fuzzy Feeling

"love is not a feeling in the first place. While people in love do indeed experience tingles, titillations, or other warm and fuzzy churnings, these are not themselves what love is. These positive feelings and sensations may be like the icing on the cake, but not the cake. They make loving feel good; but they are not what makes love so valuable and coveted by all or most of us. When you're in love you may get goose bumps but we would be hard pressed to say that being in love is getting goose bumps. So what then is love?"

"Christian love is not a warm, fuzzy feeling that believers try to “work up” so they can love others. It is practical! Love is about meeting needs."

True love is not a warm fuzzy feeling. It's not something you feel for a little while, and it's not something that can go away. If you truly love someone, it lasts forever.
It is a popular idea today that...when you love someone,...it is temporary. That love...love is just an emotion, and nothing else.
For most people, when asked what love is, they will say it is an emotion because that's all they've ever known. Most people have never had the pleasure of experiencing true love, and I know this because true love never dies. True love, real, christian love is forever. It's not just a feeling that we get. It's not just that pounding heart, those shaking lips and hands, it's not just the stumbling over words, and the smiles at a gift. It's the arguments, too. It's the angry nights, the sad mornings, the loyalty, and the commitment, the "I forgive you's". 

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

"4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

Love is when someone hurts you, but you choose to stay with them anyway. Love is true, and sweet, and nothing can break it.

Love is teamwork.

It's not just a feeling that comes and goes. True love is not fleeting, but eternal. Forever.

Love is not just a "fuzzy feeling".

Love Is A Choice

Love is a choice.

I watched a movie not too long ago about a girl who was kidnapped. She lived with the man for years and years, and when she finally came forward and told people what that man had done, she said "he forced me to love him and he made me stay". You cannot be forced into love. Love is not something you can learn, or change your mind about. Because love is a choice.
Love is something you choose to do.

I read something that said

" real love is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person.

It's true.

When all the butterflies have fluttered away and your wedding day becomes a distant memory, you will discover that you've married someone who is just as imperfect as you. And they, in turn, will come to learn that you have problems, insecurities, struggles, quirks--and body odor--just as real as theirs!

Then you will realize that real love isn't just a euphoric, spontaneous feeling--it's a deliberate choice--a plan to love each other for better and worse, for richer and poorer, in sickness and in health. Of course, you don't choose who you're attracted to, but you definitely choose who you fall in love with and (more importantly) who you stay in love with."

We live in a world that tells us to follow our hearts, and that when we no longer feel a fuzzy feeling whenever we see that person's face, we are no longer in love.

'Commitment to an imperfect person', 'a deliberate choice'. Love is not something that just happens - yeah, yeah, love at first sight isn't real - it takes time. It takes many choices and many turns and twists that may throw you off track for awhile, but when it comes down to it, if you choose to love someone, and they choose to love you, only the love of God will make you any happier.

Have a blessed night. Sweet dreams.

Marisa

Love Is Commitment

Love is commitment.

True love is not something tangible. It's not something you can touch. It's a mutual agreement between the two people that they will always stay committed. They will never leave each other or forsake one another. There will not be anyone else. It is one girl, and one boy who are completely and fully committed to never leaving the other person's side. "Till death do us part".

Love is not something you can throw away. If you " don't love" someone anymore, you never did. Because love is commitment, and when you are committed, you don't lie, or cheat, or go to someone else. You are loyal. You are loving, and selfless knowing going into the relationship that till death do you part, you are with that person forever. Sickness, health, decay, anger, sadness, when they are lovable, and when they are not so lovable. True love is patient, and kind, and sweet and true.

Sorry it was a bit short, and sorry I posts late. Many blessings.

Marisa. 💜

Love Is...

Good morning, lovelies.

So, today in my youth group, we talked about love, and what love is, etcetera. My pastor was telling us about a couple who he is counselling and how when they first started, they walked through the door, and he said "what will hold your marriage together?".

That prompted my thoughts on what love is, so for the next 13 days (until Valentines day) I'm going to try and do one post every day about what love is.

Here's the layout:

1. Love is commitment

2. Love is a choice

3. Love is not a " fuzzy feeling"

4. Love is a promise

5. Love is Godly

6. Love is A packaged deal

7. Marriage is not undoable (divorce is not an option)

8. Love is understanding

9. Love is forgiving

10. Love is honest

11. Love is in sickness and in health

12. Love is until death

13. Love is like God's love of the church

I look forward to the first one tomorrow.